In college I worked in a coffee shop downtown. We had your usual business types and politicians (a-holes), then we had your bike cops (nice but racist as fuck) and finally we had the homeless population. We didn’t get lot of them, just a few regulars who scraped up enough change for coffee so they could use the bathroom to wash up. One of those regulars was Claude. He liked to go by “Reverend Claude” and he would do a little shuffle for you if you asked him to dance. He was mentally disturbed and living in a state facility downtown.
One afternoon he had come in and was intent on getting me to kiss his ring. “It’s the sacred heart, kiss it, kiss it”. I said no but he was being very persistent. Finally I told him the the customer at the bar was my boyfriend and he wouldn’t like it if I kissed another man. He decided he needed to meet my man (a guy I’d never seen before) so they had a quick conversation. The young stranger played along and Claude left, appeased. Embarrassed, I thanked the man who said he was happy to do it.
We used to give Claude bus money from our tip jar but eventually the boss caught on and told us not to encourage Claude to come in. Eventually he was banned from entering unless he could purchase something.